When a person you love dies, it’s natural to feel sorrow, express grief, and expect friends and family to provide understanding and comfort. Unfortunately, the same doesn’t always hold true if the one who died was your companion animal. Many consider grieving inappropriate for someone who has lost “just a pet.” Nothing could be further from the truth. People love their pets and consider them members of their family. Caregivers celebrate their pets’ birthdays, confide in their animals, and carry pictures of them in their wallets.

When your beloved pet dies, it’s not unusual to feel overwhelmed by the intensity of your sorrow. Animals provide companionship, acceptance, emotional support, and unconditional love during the time they share with you. If you understand and accept this bond between humans and animals, you’ve already taken the first step toward coping with pet loss: knowing that it is okay to grieve when your pet dies.

While grief is a personal experience, you need not face loss alone. Many forms of support are available, including pet bereavement counseling services, pet-loss support hotlines, local or online Internet bereavement groups, books, videos, and magazine articles, Here are a few suggestions to help you cope:

• Acknowledge your grief and give yourself permission to express it.
• Don’t hesitate to reach out to others who can lend a sympathetic ear. The Delta Society offers a list of pet loss hotlines for those grieving over the death of a pet.
• Write about your feelings, either in a journal or a poem.
• Call your local humane society to see whether it offers a pet loss support group or can refer you to one.
• Prepare a memorial for your pet.
• Ask your veterinarian or local animal shelter about available pet loss hotlines.
• Explore the Internet for pet loss support groups and coping information.

The loss of a pet may be a child’s first experience with death. The child may blame himself, his parents, or the veterinarian for not saving the pet. And he may feel guilty, depressed, and frightened that others he loves may be taken from him. Trying to protect your child by saying the pet ran away could cause your child to expect the pet’s return and feel betrayed after discovering the truth. Expressing your own grief may reassure your child that sadness is ok and help him work through his feelings.

Coping with the loss of a pet can be particularly hard for seniors. Those who live alone may feel a loss of purpose and an immense emptiness. The pet’s death may also trigger painful memories of other losses and remind caregivers of their own mortality. What’s more, the decision to get another pet is complicated by the possibility that the pet may outlive the caregiver, and hinges on the person’s physical and financial ability to care for a new pet. For all these reasons, it’s critical that senior pet owners take immediate steps to cope with their loss and regain a sense of purpose. If you are a senior, try interacting with friends and family, calling a pet loss support hotline, even volunteering at a local humane society. If you know seniors in this situation, direct them to this page, and guide them through the difficult grieving process.

Surviving pets may whimper, refuse to eat or drink, and suffer lethargy, especially if they had a close bond with the deceased pet. Even if they were not the best of friends, the changing circumstances and your emotional state may distress them. However, if your remaining pet/s continue to act out of sorts, there could actually be a medical problem that requires your veterinarian’s attention. Give surviving pets lots of TLC, and try to maintain a normal routine. It’s good for them and for you.

You’ll know when the time is right to adopt a new pet after giving yourself time to grieve, carefully considering the responsibilities of pet ownership, and paying close attention to your feelings.When you’re ready, remember that your local animal shelter is a great place to find your next special friend.